December 2012 has been particularly rough on me. December is usually rough enough; this time of the year make me miss my mom more than the rest. I have also been dealing with the loss of my grandmother, Mama, and it was weird not having her around for the usual holiday cheer. The holidays seemed to sort of pass away on a grey palette rather than their normal riot of color. My birthday is also in December and this year it depressed me to not have reached some of my goals before another year ticked off on my life.
But, December is passing away, we only have a day and a half left of it here. I am starting to feel hopeful again. (Despair may have won for a while there…) I can tell I am more hopeful, because I am writing again. I am working on those last little shining bits of novel-1 and am hoping to get it to beta readers in early 2013. It is my hope to get their feedback before I take another pass on the novel and shine it up into its Sunday clothes and bring it out into the world. (By which I mean, submitting to agents…which is admittedly a little scary for me to think about.)
I’m not too big on New Year’s resolutions since everyone seems to make them and break them. However, I really like goals. So here are some goals for 2013 (in no particular order):
- Get novel-1 to beta readers
- Write a complete first draft of novel-1’s sequel. NaNo novel 2011 is an incomplete draft of this book.
- Research agents
- Write log-line for novel-1
- Write query letter for novel-1
- Send query letter to agents in batches
- Try not to gain 30 pounds whilst querying agents.
- Finish NaNoWriMo 2012 novel
- Figure out novel-1’s genre – It takes place in a mix of the real world that has magic and a pseudo-high fantasy realm. Urban fantasy? High fantasy? I’m not 100% certain. I’m pretty sure it isn’t paranormal.
- Outline the second sequel to novel-1. Yay for trilogies. 🙂
- Keep up Yoga practice
- Write daily!
©K. Klein 2012
Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape. ~Author Unknown
Last night was my first time doing yoga in a month because of being sick. And man did I feel the gap between my last yoga session and this one. I was super tight and stiff while warming up. Thankfully the instructor took us through a good warm up and I loosened up, but it reminded me why it is important to practice. Obviously, being sick is a good reason to take it easy, but hopefully I will be healthy the rest of this winter and then I shall need to stick with my practice.
Yoga, like my writing, is something that I love to do, but it doesn’t always come easily to me. It takes a long time to form a life changing habit – getting to form those grooves in the neural pathways of the brain. I still haven’t recovered my writing everyday or even near everyday habit that I broke at the end of grad school. Obviously school was important to me, but I am still upset that I haven’t gotten back on the horse, so to speak. I am writing, but not every day.
I would be astounded if I could get to doing yoga every day. Right now my goal is to practice 1-2 times weekly and once I establish that routine maybe put in another session. I don’t want to jump the gun now because I am trying to re-establish the every week yoga that I’d work on in the late summer and early autumn.
It is interesting to me to see how difficult it is to form new and good habits and so damn easy for me to fall back on already established habits. It is annoying because sometimes I know these established patterns of behavior are unproductive. (I’m looking at your anxiety freak outs). But as with all things, if I want to change myself, I have to try. And so here I am going at it one week at a time with yoga and one day at a time with writing.
©K. Klein 2012
What is an intention? An intention is not a goal. A goal is something that you measure and check off when you have completed it. An intention is a conscious gesture to align your mind, heart, imagination, and body with whatever act you’re about to begin. You attach yourself to your goal’s outcomes and assess your success accordingly. You let go of an intention’s outcome and let go of notions of success altogether. Goals guide business; intentions guide soul.
~By Jeff Davis from pg. 4-5 The Journey from the Center to the Page
What am I doing yoga for? I practice yoga to calm myself. I practice yoga to sweat and unwind the knots in both my mind and my muscles. When I step on the mat I try to set an internal intention. Why am I here today? The answer usually centers on my emotional state. Often I am combating my anxiety; trying to see the world from a new perspective.
Yoga does wonderful things for allowing my brain to relax and let go. Jeff Davis brings together yoga and writing in his book, which I quoted above. I often go into writing with goals. For example, I want to finish my rewrite by October 31; I need to hit at least 75,000 words. However, I don’t think I have ever set a writing intention. I am not sure what it would be.
Reading this book has sparked the question in my mind: what do I write for? Or perhaps even: why write? The latter is easier to answer than the former. Why write: because I cannot stop. (Not for lack of trying earlier in my life). Writing allows me to be a happier person; I write to revel in the flow and the joy of writing. However, the first question, I do not know the answer too. I shall have to think and reflect on it.
Davis goes on to say:
“An intention plants a seed, a suggestion that may manifest during that writing session or may not manifest until two weeks or a year later” (p5).
At this moment, I do not know what my writing intention is or what it will be. But I certainly have some food for thought. Do you set an intention before walking on the yoga mat? Do you set an intention before a writing session?
©K. Klein 2012
I recently moved back home from living a couple of hours downstate. I moved there to earn my masters degree; I majored in library science. A few weeks ago, my dear friend, G invited me to go to her gym and take a yoga class with her there. She had several free classes, which enabled me to go with her three weeks in a row.
I really enjoyed being able to take the yoga class with my friend. I also really liked the teacher who taught that class; she gave the classroom of beginners a lot of options for how far we each wanted to go without pushing us too far. Well, I suppose I should say without pushing me too far.
Sadly, because I am unemployed currently, I cannot afford the weekly fee to join my friend at her gym and continue taking the yoga classes. So now I am a bit of a crossroads. Where do I take my yoga practice from here?
I often have a difficult time practicing alone – I find it difficult to hold myself accountable in that respect. There is something about being in a classroom with other people, which I find motivational . I suppose at this point I am just bitching about my circumstances. I can either practice or not. I just tend to dilly dally when given the option; this week there will be a lot of that since I caught a bit of a nasty flu bug. So I wonder; where to start when I resume my weekly practice next week?
©K. Klein 2012